blocks are over!!

phew...after wad seemed like years..blocks have finally ended. finally don have to force myself not to be online, not to watch tv, not to slack around...sobsob. it was so tough. don have to stay out and up late in the nite to study at macs and stuff and get harrassed by little kids. haha. yay. got a 5 day break straight! yea man.

hmm let me do an evaluation on my blocks den..

econs: ok la..not TOO bad. at least i know wad to write. but max also get D only. sigh.
gp: wrote a geog essay. duno can nots. can den can pass lor. but compre was bad...duno how to do.
phy: bad bad bad. i hate myself. how can i screw up my fav subj. ah! H3!!
math: ooo..i'm so proud of myself. seriously. neva done math for so long and finish so many qns in an exam before. more than wad i did for Os lor. wah. so proud of myself:)) but pass not still a doubt la haha. i only know i did but correct not..haha. that's a gd qn.
chem: bad..i think it's the worst man..i was practically half asleep. fail is confirm de. haiz.

ok i think i'll retain. oh man. but they say HC blocks are for selection for H3 ppl..so fail is norm. is it true? oh man. but my phy??!! argh. suan le. depressing. argh.

tdy went out whole day with lcpsk. haha. ok i know i'm like not part of it or anything. so hmm. hope i wasnt like intruding. haiz. din do much actually. haha. jus ate. drink. ALOT OF APPLE JUICE =x den watch a bit of green forest (green forest!!!!) watch them play bball. all so pro :S anyhow shoot also will get in de. so pro...

oh tdy also went to pei someone see doc. haiyo. nvm. shall not talk bout it. but you ah. so ham ji. wadeva it is. haha. lousy leh :P and hor. i mean it when i say i don like ppl to say that. and you still add on. i know got nth wrong actually. but i don like how ppl respond to that fact and talk about it. i really don like it.

haiz. so tired le now. all the blocks and stoopid stuff going on. argh. i guess learning how to put down is wad we all have to learn. i'm sorry. i know you wun see this but anyways sorry. you'll find the one one day de. don say you're not meant to love or be loved. friends. :)

bleahx. tired le. tml got syf opening ceremony. haha. go see ng cheeyang sing song. vip tix!! ooo. haha. i shall go off le. anw thx kh!! for the vcd. and kh's sis. haha. thx man. ok everyone. nites den:)

学习放下..

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED .been asked to do a dumble thing but will do it in the name of fun

1.Do the following WITHOUT complains.
2.Choose 5 people to do this after you completed yours
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged
4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED BY: WILSON =_=

Favourites
favourite colour: dark blue
favourite food: hello panda!! (is it a food?)
favourite song: lan man shou ji (most of all jay's songs:))
favourite movie: a walk to remember
favourite sport: sports? me?? haha...
favourite day of the week: saturday
favourite season: autumn
favourite ice-cream: chocolate and coffee de ba..

Currents
current mood: stonedd
current taste: huh?
current clothes: shirt and pants lor...
current deskstop: 1006 gals..
current toenail: o.O??
current time: 5.17pm ( i'm going to be late!)
current surroundings: mess
current annoyances: heh? i jus know i screwed my physics..
current thoughts: where are you..

First
first best friends: hweemin:) bethia
crush: stitch, haha..
first movie: i duno lehs
first lie: how to remb..
first music: i duno la

Lasts
last cigarette: do i look like i smoke?? >.<
last drink: choc milk
last car ride: this morn
last crush: 离开树的叶子( perhaps...)
last movie: ehh. i not stupid 2 lor haha.
last phone call: call a fren to ask how's physics..
last CD played: jay chou ba du kong jian

Have you ever
have you ever dated your best friend: huh wad you mean?
have you ever broken the law: huh wad law..no ba i guess, i very guai de:D
have you ever been arrested: no
have you ever skinny-dipped: o.o?? heh?
have you been on tv: dont think so..
have you ever kissed someone you don't know: nooo

things you are wearing: i thot say le.
things you done today: breathe. drink. eat. walk. sit....alot. and screw my phy.
things you can hear right now: ys's blog song
thing you do when you are bored: slack

5 people to tag? elainey. anna. leheng. ongsiyun. betheeaah. (haha..don scold me ahh>.<)

lol.. is jus some lame "game".. hope u try it out as well

it's a small small world...

ahaha...jus had math tuition at toa payoh hdb hub. some math excel tuition centre.. went there earlier to eat dinner and stil ended up late cos we JUS ouldn't find the stoopid place. was super lost la. haiyo. so embarrassing.

SAW YONGSHENG THERE! and yes it's the aj tanyongsheng. haha. not the 2 hc yongshengs...wah the world really very small. i was about to step in the room le then this familiar voice called out "shermin!" and then i turned, o.O!! "yong sheng!!" haha.. so funny. then almost immediately we called wilson. with ys phone. haha. he sounds so shocked. think he thot call wrong no or sth. i say i'm shermin he took at least 10 secs to digest that phrase. hahahaha... :P told you to come don want. ayer.

math tuition was great. for once, i neva felt math lesson was so tiring and looong... and finally math is in english!! for so long i always felt it is in tamil or sth x_x un-understandable. haha. friday's one will be on sequences and series..think that one i'll die. haiya. today i realise my math foundation is real bad. there was this math question that i was stuck for quite a while, and i realise i actually know the math logic, and the prob actually is...i dont know wad is a ln curve..-.- sighh. so dumb of me. haha.

july still got math classes..should i still join? think i should lor. i need help :S haiz. lousy me... oh man i duno wad happened to me..i think i ate some wrong thing. diarrhoea..bleahx. keep going to the toilet... oh man. think i'm losing weight. which is a gd thing!! yea man.

ok i should go slp le..*yawn. i better mug as well...sighh. stomach ache >.< sob sob. i go slp le..nites everyone:))

back from batam!!

hellos..finished my church camp ytd. was great...had a great time:) food was super nice la. oh man. i think i grew fatter. definitely de. did many things for the first time. haha.

i swam for the first time in many many years...oh man. and i mean many many years..after i realise how much fats i have..sobsob:( but i swam hoping to get rid of the tan line but wow...there was no sun..duno good news or not. sigh. went for the indonesian massage. had to take off everything (!!!) o.O me and anna were like struggling to keep the towels there. haha. or we'll see each other from head to toe le (!!) haha. apparently i hurt my right shoulder or sth. cos you're not suppose to feel pain when being massaged. my left shoulder was completely shuang, but right was horrigible. pain like crazy. was struggling la..

oh and i also went for "go-cart"..yaa. obviously i drive very the slowly la. the rest went 8 rounds and i went for 4! haha. waste money but was fun la. so nvm..hee.i was so scared i din even press the accelerator for many times, while the guys were practically stepping on it throughout. they were like spinning and skidding at each curb doing their fashionable turns and styles while i'm struggling to turn the steering wheel..sighh:(

the service there was excellent. and i really mean excellent. everywhere you go you see a smile on al their faces. they're really nice. yupp:) nice people..yay. we called for room service 5 times straight la. haha. oops we girls are jus so picky. but the guy came in with a smile always...he recognise us le lor. make frens le. haha.

actually this camp made me think alot. ponder bout the thing that is bothering me still. i endured alot for you. and i don even know if it is wad i want. talking to anna had helped quite a bit altho i din come with any conclusion or anything. but saying some things out helped. feel better. love you anna! at least i know the world is not void..i jus hope i get things clear soon. now that i see another shrouded cloud coming towards me...

well i should start studyin you know.. oh man. i'm so going to die. die die die. ok i should go le. cya everyone:)

i really tolerated alot this camp.
and i don even know if it is worth it.
is it?
pls tell me it is
if it's not,
let me know it soon, Lord.
//
wad are you thinking?
wad do you want?
you want me to tell you but how can i?
when i don see how this trust will work
i dont know how to treat you
i don want a wrong idea.
neither do i want to lose this.
non cada per me..

fun before my leave...

sometimes you jus wonder wad on earth are they watching..watch until liddat. wah guys are jus so strange..we girls are totally disgusted by wad's showing on tv and they are jus so interested and mesmerized by it...diaos -.-" engrossed until we girls are taking photos of them they also dunno...sighh.

chalet was fun..altho not very exciting and adventurous cos the guys were busy playing their FF and wrestling. haha. but me and another girl (only got 2 girls btw...) jus took a walk along the beach.. talk talk. then we went to one of the rooms and enjoy ourself witing for the rest of the ppl to come..haha. slept on the big big beds. then best. kena scandaled. nvm..shall not talk bout it. WHY YOU WAKE UP AND LET HIM IN?? sigh..nvm. i wen xin wu kui jiu ke yi le.

i think the most bleah part was "truth or dare"..so sad la i kena. sob sob. of cos i took truth. cos i live openly lor. haha. then they ask some stoopid qn. so embarrassing. ayer. oh man. how can ask this kind of thing de:( suan le. wad i say is true anyway... xp

left the chalet at bout 1030pm. so late le...then my nice senior sent me all the way to woodlands. and he asked me a super strange qn. i don even get where that qn came from and how he gets that idea...strange. haha. quite interestin also la the qn..haha. my fren's boyfren was nice enough to send her home fr the mrt and called her to accompany her home on the phone..sigh. *envy*

i'm leaving for camp this fri. early in the morn..sighh. away from this land for 4 whole days. i guess i'll...i'll miss you. no, i know i will.. 4 days of total disconnection from the world here. sigh. how am i to survive. but at least im with church so i guess it wouldn't be as bad...i guess.. well mus go pack le. haiz. duno wad to say le. take care everyone and enjoy mugging.

hey darling i have 2 words for you:
i love you
why 2 words?
cos you and i are one..
if loving you is a crime,
then i'll be a criminal for life..
想念你会是个痛苦的事，只愿不是单方面的情义...

12:14 PM

dust and MORE DUST!!

>>> wushu guys trying to squeeze into their secondary school pe shirt >.<"

>>> wushu junk all over the floor outside. the aunty was giving us murderous stares...

oh my..jus had wushu spring cleaning. and we realise we were like sleeping on a dust desert for 6 months...goodness. you should see the dust in our hui suo. it's seriously acdesert. no exaggeration >.<> spot for at least 4 times to get rid of the dust. bleahx...

the whole corridor was filled with bing qi and comics and wushu junk. and i mean ALOT of comics. like 90 over of jue dai shuang jiao, 40 over KOF and many many of the dragon ball thing. ayer. and wad samurai thing. aiya. alot jiu dui le. haha. things that date back to the 1970s....wah..really ancient. everyone was half dead or rather dead by the time we cleared the dust. all kena lung cancer and suffocation. wahh...should have taken a photo of the desert...

hm...i think i'll take more to recover completely. guess i din really want to interact today so sorry for drifting away and stoning jus now...sighh.

oh anyway ytd's wushu grading was -.- sighh...did so horribly. was shaking la. stoopid. cos i could see pairs of eyes staring at me... cant take it:( but at least i passed la. we peeped at the score sheet. but din see my marks. ayer. nvm. don see better..depressing. the small kids all so cute. not very pro la but chao cute. but got one small girl. wah. chao pro. she do chang quan then i'm so amazed. din do ce kong fan but she did one hand. wah zai.

see all the small kids there so malu la. oh man. they keep "wah-ing" at our moves altho they are like jus nth de. so cuute..haha:)

>>> look at the small boyboys in front!!! ahh!! so cuuuuute. oh man. ok anyway that was a scary place

i'm so sorry..

i think i really need to reflect on myself. perhaps you're right. i'm so sorry. but perhaps it's jus where i'm standing from. i have nothing le. you are all i have. i'm so sorry. i didn't know i'm making you tired. i din know i wasnt there for you. i'm so not worth it. i'm not..i'm so sorry. i'm so so sorry.

are you tired? i jus... i jus din want to experience it again. maybe i'm wrong. i'm sorry. if i didn't see that, i wouldn't know. i'm a failure. i have failed completely.

alot to say..but no one to talk to... i have failed.

RIGIDO :(

ah!! this sunday's grading! oh man. i hope i don fail. should not be that bad as to fail right? oh man.. sniff sniff. i jus realise my si liu ma is wrong la. oh man. die..argh. and my pu bu is hopeless >.<" helpp.... die die die. and i haf to travel all the way to far far pasir ris myself.. oh no. i'm so scared la :S

oh anywayy, wad's today's date?? it's 10/06!! ooo...let's celebrate this grerat day. haha. but seems like no one realised. i saw the date on my phone and i was all excited. oops. haha. a bit crazy le. cos jus had breakfast with my dear helenlen:)) went to eat macs. then got disturbed by the stoopid curtain that flaps whenever someone opens the door. bleahx.

then we went to talk talk walk walk. bought rubber bands. but i couldnt find my water bottle lehs. sad:( i still like that billabong or that nike one. but hm...duno lehs. now helen knows that sun plaza is really not a shopping centre. haha. everything also don have. then she went to buy her click five cd. whoever they are. haha. i miss you helenlen!! loveya loads:))

oh anyway yesterday was a great great day. yea man. not the training part of cos. haha. altho i spotted my flaws before i face the judges. oh no. ok anyway ytd was great! yeah.. so long neva like that le. sob sob. nvm. anyway thanks for peiing me hor. hee. and your frens are so violent. so scary. woodlands got so many gong jiao ppl.. eeyer. hahaaa.

oh man! wad am i doing here?? i should be mugging. sigh.. wah the sky so black. mus go close windows le. and suffocate myself. haha. oh man i'm so crappy tdy. okok rain le. byee everyone!! take care and happy mugging:)

fare non caduta per a me...i mean it..pls dont

ooo... a new skin. haha. not exactly very nice la i know. but the pic is like hm...i jus wish i could do that. but sigh. the world is cruel.

so many things happened la. past few days. but well...glad things are ok le. a misunderstanding ba i suppose. i duno. but everything normal then good le. that's all i want. oh and anyway thanks kah hwee...although i know you like blur blur bout wad happened..haha. jus thanks for like listening=)

woke up at an unearthly hour today in hope of crashing...plotted a great story to my parents and all fell apart by sone lazy pig..sighh. suan le. not the first time le anyway. so yaa.

nothing much to say actually. jus that i need to mug. seriously. but i cant seem to do so. bleahx. die die. i better stop thinking bout stuff and get down to work. sigh. cant help it laa.

是现实的残酷
还是是我自己被私欲蒙骗
是我太心急？
还是你太被动？
我不要求奢侈
只期望单纯
我真的很想拿下眼前的蒙骗
但我宁愿自己继续睡下去
不要醒来
我不想面对现实
如果现实里没有你，
让我睡下去吧

灰姑娘

听见别人提起你的名字
我就会脸红
一张有你合照的照片
看来看去都不厌倦
坐在寂寞了很久的窗前
不停地想念
从没有对谁的支字片语
可以读了好几百遍
像童话中的世界
如今出现在真实人生的眼前
再苦闷的时刻
也有彩虹
哪怕只是轻靠你的肩
像传说中的爱情
如今出现在真实人生的眼前
当你拥抱着我
轻轻地对我说
你会爱我到永远
我就像cinderella
等到了寻找我的他
爱情的的过程
总会有泪有挣扎
有你的温柔
我就什么都的不怕
我就像
等到了寻找我的他
等待你是我付出最甜蜜的代价
快乐的cinderella真爱得到了回答

i'm in love with this song..oh man. i'm serious. the lyrics are like..nice. but not exactly...haha. too nice to be true.

i'm having alot of thoughts running through my mind now. am i living in a delusion? a delusion that this is true. an illusion that this is wad i want...i duno. you make me think. whenever this happens i think. i'm not thinking too much. i'm serious. i'm not. i'm clear and sobre. but lost and confused.

perhaps i'm living in a delusion.

shermin was dead in sec 2. shermin poured her heart out to her. she told her all her thoughts. shermin was smiling always. cos she had nothing troubling her. all was told. but in sec 2, when she left, shermin died. she was lost. thrown alone in the world. she had no one to tell. from then i duno how to tell. i jus don know how. it's jus a fear. that someone would leave. that no one would understand. i don know how. it's not i want to think. and it's not becos i don want to tell. it's not cos i want to hide. but cos i dont know how. and i dont know who to tell.

you have evoked these emotions in me. my deepest feelings.

all i want is someone to stay by me. someone to listen. someone to understand. someone to love me. is this too much to ask for?? whyy?? why take her away? why take me away?

shermin doesnt know how to tell.

she jus dont know how.

why cant you be the one?

刻骨铭心

yay i'm ok le:) no more fever!! yea man. sigh. if only i was well on the concert day. sigh sigh sigh. but i'm still drowned in phlegm :S my voice still sounds like i have blocked nose but in actual fact, i have blocked lungs. i'm serious. half my lung is like phlegm la. urgh. can feel it choking up. whenever i breathe is like i'll choke myself. so gan kor.

tdy got wushu training. din train for long cos i couldnt breathe. bleahx. feel like puking:( i think is the stoopid abtibiotics or sth. everything i eat has no taste de. super destroying my appetite. urgh. cant wait to finish it...make people feel so disgusted. bleah...

tml got wushu cip. go sell bookmarks. haha. hope can sell at least a few la. sighs. haha. cip hours...yeah. k la i got nth much to write le. been stoning at home for many days. tml shall start mugging! yea man i must! okok. jiayou everyone. buhbye.
where are you..i cant seem to find you.
take care YOU.i feel so helpless..this always happens.i duno wad to do.pls jus take care.